7/14/08: NWA Anarchy TV Report, Episode #126: Shadowmania Runs Wild
7/14/08: NWA Anarchy TV Report, Episode #126: Shadowmania Runs Wild
Jul 14 2008, 07:48 PM
Rez Dog 49
Joined: 25-June 06
From: Southside Richmond, VA
Member No.: 14
NWA Anarchy TV Report
July 14, 2008
WRESTLING: (n.) \’res-ling\ A sport of contest in which two individuals face off in unarmed combat.
ANARCHY: (n.) \an-ar-key\ (1) A state of lawlessness due to absence of authority. (2) A complete lack of order.
What happens when you mix the two together? NWA-Anarchy!
- Welcome to NWA Anarchy Wrestling, this is PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING~! Last week on NWA Anarchy TV, Jeff Lewis vs. Hayden Young failed to yield a #1 contender to the NWA Anarchy TV Title after fighting to a draw, and Phil Shatter powerbombed his way to victory over Shaun Tempers in a brutal match. This week, Iceberg w/Dan Wilson seeks to squash Don Matthews. The main event is a tag team Mega-Rumble with the winning team earning a title shot against the NWA Anarchy Tag Team Champions the Devil’s Rejects at Fanfest on May 31.
1. NWA Anarchy Heavyweight Champion “the Altar of Human Mutilation” Iceberg w/”the Reverend” Dan Wilson & the Staff of Righteousness pinned “Merciless” Don Matthews in a non-title match.
Early on, Matthews overpowers the champion by swiftly kicking his knee. After commercial, Iceberg dominates by administering brutal punishment and destroying all comeback attempts. Iceberg continues the massacre with three consecutive turnbuckle whips while throwing in a pair of corner splashes and the dreaded human cannonball. After taking a long and methodical beating, Matthews brings the NWA Arena Back to Life™ with a powerslam. He scores a near fall with his patented BFK. Iceberg applies a bearhug, but Matthews escapes with the Lariat of Doom. Everything appears hunky-dory for the Merciless One, but “the Stray Cat” Brody Ray Chase & “the Main Squeeze” Melissa Coates unveil their evil intentions by making out at ringside. Matthews pays dearly for turning his attention to his former Anger Inc. ally. One belly to belly suplex and Ground Xero splash later, Iceberg celebrates another victory.
COMMENTS: The finish didn’t do anything to help either wrestler or the NWA Anarchy Heavyweight Title especially when Don Matthews is involved in a mid-card comedic love triangle and Iceberg is cleanly slaughtering competition. Otherwise, this match was much better on TV than live.
- Dan Wilson hands over the crowd jewel over to Iceberg when the NWA Elite make an appearance. With Shatter chomping at the bits, Wilson announces Iceberg will defend the title against the Universal Soldier on May 31, which will be the last one. Wilson even offers a tag title shot against Shaun Tempers & Azreal.
2. Shadow Jackson & Slim J won the tag team Mega-Rumble to earn a shot at the NWA Anarchy Tag Team Champions the Devil’s Rejects on May 31.
RULES: Tag teams will enter at two minute intervals. A tag team is eliminated when one member is thrown over the top rope and both feet hit the floor.
ENTRY #1 & #2: Brody Ray Chase & Melissa Coates and the Friday Night Franchise (Matt “Sex” Sells & Ryan Michaels.)
ENTRY #3: Big Time Playaz (Jack McKenzie & David Matthews) join us from the state of Texas.
ELIMINATION #1: Friday Night Franchise by Chase & Coates.
ENTRY #4: The Texas Treats (Chris Marval & “Bishop Magic” Don Juan.) They have a funny sequence thrusting sequence with Coates. Then again, Don Juan has a wacky charisma and is always entertaining.
ENTRY #5: Mr. Rob Adonis & Jeremy Vain.
ELIMINATION #2: Chase & Coates (by the Texas Treats). That drew a pop.
ELIMINATION #3: The Texas Treats (by Mr. Adonis & Vain.) BOOOOOOOOO!
ELIMINATION #4: The Big Time Playaz (by Mr. Adonis & Vain.) The lights flicker and Mikal Judas inflicts damage on Mr. Adonis & Vain.
ENTRY #6: Wesley Grissom & Chip Day.
ELIMINATION #5: Mr. Adonis & Vain by Grissom & Day. After commercial, Judas chases off Vain and delivers the Mafia Kick to Mr. Adonis.
ENTRY #7: The Technicians (Bob E & Tyler Smith).
ENTRY #8: Talent & Money (JT Talent & Andrew Pendleton III) head out to a loud ovation from the ladies.
ENTRY #9: The Wild Bunch (Chris King & “Brokeback” Billy Buck.)
ENTRY #10: Hollywood Brunettes (Kyle Matthews & “the Wizard of Aaaaaaaahs” Andrew Alexander).
ELIMINATION #6: Grissom & Day (Day by Grissom.)
ELIMINATION #7: The Technicians (by Grissom.)
ENTRY #11: The New Wave (Derek Driver & Steven Walters). Walters ends up on the wrong end of a 7 man Tower of Doom.
After commercial, the Konkrete Gorillas enters through the back door claiming the NWA Arena as their jungle.
ENTRY #12: The Konkrete Gorillas (Nemesis & Jay Fury)
ELIMINATION #8: Talent & Money (by the Gorillas.)
ELIMINATION #9: The Hollywood Brunettes (by the Gorillas.)
ELIMINATION #10: The Wild Bunch (by the Gorillas.)
ELIMINATION #11: The New Wave (by the Gorillas.) Okay, that’s a good way to get over teams that have been vying for the #1 tag team contenders for the past few months. On a serious note, Billy Buck has tremendously improved over the past year.
ENTRY #13: Shadow Jackson & Slim J. Alright, it’s time for the big guns here and Shadow and Nemesis waste no time brawling in mid-ring. Nemesis takes over with a chop block on Shadow and pummeling Slim J from behind. Shadow & Slim buy some time with dualing DDT’s. The Gorillas regain the advantage and prepare to eliminate Shadow, but Slim makes the save. Nemesis resorts to kicking Shadow’s bad leg and prevents Slim from eliminating Fury. The Gorillas punish Shadow in the corner with loud chops. WHOO! Fury pulls out the noose and hangs Slim J for the second consecutive time. Somehow, Slim fights his way loose and Shadow aids in sending Fury tumbling from the top turnbuckle to the floor. Slim tosses Nemesis for good measure. Fury heads back in to attack, but Shadow & Slim assault him with the security preventing Nemesis from making the save. Fury finally escapes.
COMMENTS: This was just another demonstration of Bill Behrens’ brilliance in booking rumble style matches 101.
OVERALL: The Shadow & Slim vs. Concrete Gorillas has to be the hottest feud in the three year history of NWA Anarchy, even bigger than the Elite vs. the Rejects. (A feud that ingeniously made fans feel slimy for cheering for Jeff G. Bailey.) When Summer ’08 ends, Al Gore will launch a new campaign blaming the NWA Arena, NWA Anarchy and Cornelia, Georgia for global warming.
Rush Limbaugh on Whoppie Goldberg: "Whoopie Goldberg is a five star imbecile, a glittering jewel of colossal ignorance."
Timmy Danger to Playboy Pete on GXW Inferno: "You're the only guy that makes Dr. Stud look like Ric Flair."
Comedian Wanka Sykes on Rush Limbaugh: "Rush Limbaugh, I hope the country fails; I hope his kidneys fail, how about that? He needs a good waterboarding, that's what he needs."
The Joker in Batman: Arkham Asylum: "Too easy! Played you like a violin, then cut your strings!"
An exchange between Pharaoh and a backwoods fan at the Carolina Sports Arena in Burlington, NC:
Pharaoh: I'm a GOD, do you hear me?
Fan: God's up there.
Pharaoh: NO!!!! I'm a god, you eunuch.
Fan: God is WHITE!
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